Flame Warriors ~ View topic

Clueless Newb Joined: 07 Jan 2005 Posts: 15

Okay, remember Ned's wife from the tv-show Simpsons?

You need to have her as a housewife. In fact, you need two types of housewives:

1. Ned's wife, being a good Christian and very protective of the kids, and condemning infidels to hell; and

2. The trailer-trash, redneck housewife that I always get to see on Ricky Lake.

I don't think I need to describe what these two little buggers are all about. I see a few HW (housewife) trends in other of the Flame Warriors, but none of them are a true housewife.

Think of a housewife as a women who says that the most important profession in the world is that of a housewife. She calls her husband for hubby, always hugs people online and to those that she specially cares for, she says: 'smooches'!

I also think that you need to divide the warriors in different classes. For example, the housewives could be in the same class as nanny, cybersisters, and coffee klatch; the duelist in the same class as the kung-fu fighter, etc.

And also: if you decide to make a role-game using these characters, remember to make the housewife warriors the cheapest recruitment. They could cost as little as 1 silver, compared to 5 gold for a kung-fu fighter.

um, go to www.organizedhome.com's forums Wink

You'll get a lot of insight into these "warriors". the mods don't let it get firery over there.

Suggestion: clall her Heloise, everyone will know what the warrior's about instanter that way.
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The Average Woman Would Rather Have Beauty Than Brains Because The Average Man Can See Better Than He Can Think

Guest

(In regards to the original suggestion)

Let's not and say we did.

Heloise is the ultimate housewife is how.
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The Average Woman Would Rather Have Beauty Than Brains Because The Average Man Can See Better Than He Can Think

Heloise is a daily household hints column, appearing in virtually every important newspaper in the US, and has been since about 20 years before God was born. She is the pre-eminent household hint columnist. I'm kinda laughing at myself, she's such a household word among women, but of course, guys wouldn't know her, she exists in a different world. Suffice it to say, anyone who knew the let's-make-a-perfect-house types would know the name. Try her website here if you're curious.
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The Average Woman Would Rather Have Beauty Than Brains Because The Average Man Can See Better Than He Can Think

Ah, gotcha. That wouldn't cover the Jerry Springer guest-styled housewife, though.
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Tireless Rebutter / Archivist
The Grand Suggestion List

Guest

I don't think they can be grouped together! Trust me, the two would be enemies. Ideologies would be too far a part.

Trailer trash:
1. Eight kids with the possibility of 20 different dads.
2. Smokes and Drinks
3. Drives a broken down Ford POS
4. Stays at home on Welfare--why work when the government pays you
5. 10 cats or dogs or other barn animals.
6. Kids are supposed to go to school?

Heloise:
1. Eight Kids because of religious reasons or "LOVES kiddos". Wink

And has been faithfully married to one man.
2. Wouldn't smoke (might drink, though) because it would make her house dirty and smell bad. And it's a bad influence on kids.
3. Drives an SUV or MiniVan
4. Stays at home on "DH's" income and is proud of it! Why can't every mommy be this way? Very Happy

5. Maybe 1 cat but afraid of hair messing up her beautiful home.
6. Homeschools or kids go to Christain private school.

Another good name for Heloise would be "Martha" as in the Martha in the Bible who gets mad at Mary for not helping OR as in "Martha Stewart".

I doubt a Heloise/Martha would frequent any of the gaming boards you do unless she's checking out what her teenager is up to. What's interesting about Heloise/Martha is I've listed the above attributes, but they are probably a facade--think Desperate Housewives! A forum of Heloises will war over homeschooling, vaccums, and cleaning products.

Trailer-Trash is sufficient for the other one. That's what Heloise would call her (Whisper, though!) should they ever meet. Heloise is usually Royalty or a Cyber Sister.

I know this stuff because I'm a Heloise! I moderate a gang of them too. All the warriors are at the Heloise-type forums--they're just female. My "hubby" told me about this post.

Hmm, I like the idea of a Heloise/Martha - such duality in a single warrior!

On another note, how do I sotp my shower tap from leaking?
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The Average Woman Would Rather Have Beauty Than Brains Because The Average Man Can See Better Than He Can Think

You know, this really should be divided into more than one suggestion.

Heloise/Martha- The clean, religious type, she typically only sticks to her own. Should she wander into others' forums, it would probaly be out of boredom or curiousity. Though her attacks are fierce, she often has too little time to engage in extended battle.

Springer Guest- The filthy queen of the trailer park/slums, she mostly pops online between inebriated stupors. Though a particularly weak fighter, she is unreasonable and will often make references to her life. Though rural and urban versions of this warrior exist, they're only distinguishable by setting.
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Tireless Rebutter / Archivist
The Grand Suggestion List

Guest

Thanks for separating the housewife warriors!!!

Teamtunafish, my hubby, "Bob Villa" would have to answer that question for you.

Hugs to all of you and sending cyber cheesecakes. Gotta go hide the Easter Eggs!

Laughing

(couldn't resist! Have to stay in character)

Nah, trailor trash is slum trash's unsuccessful sister. They're in the same family.
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The Average Woman Would Rather Have Beauty Than Brains Because The Average Man Can See Better Than He Can Think

lol Evil ones, right?
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The Average Woman Would Rather Have Beauty Than Brains Because The Average Man Can See Better Than He Can Think

One thing to not forget about Martha/Heloise, she is politically correct. She is not a housewife. She is a homemaker.

There is another Housewife that has not been mentioned.

The Net-Addict Housewife

IRL, a woman was arrested for child neglect because of her internet addiction. When the authorities arrived at her home, the children were filthy and so was the house with the exception of an area around the computer which was pristine.
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Lady_Aleena
"An it harm none; do as ye will"
Sticks and stone may break my bones, but whips and chains excite me.