Flame Warriors ~ View topic - Types of people you work with or see at work

JustStuff:

Juststuff have an unnerving habit of finding and using other peoples' tools and personal effects in the workplace, usually rendering the tool or item unsuitable for it's intended use. They are often baffled why someone is now seriously irate just because they saved a few minutes by selecting someone's item for a grease wipe, a new fangled and highly unlikely chisel, a flexible lever, a light weight screwdriver, convenient clean down bench, an unfathomable cutting or scraping device, or a wedge. However it's more usual though for workmates to find their clean or sterile item covered in dirt, oil or grease or stained in some other manner.

Island:

Island has a problem from time to time with work place communication. Everyone is entitled to their private thoughts, some people share, some people don't. However work related problems or issues created by an individual activities at work, which Island is ever eager to create and share, generally need answers, if any one is asking - a good excuse or a lie to put a reason to an odd event. On average, Island is often less than forthcoming, but during odd episodes Island will completely close up, often frustrating their co-workers as they struggle to figure out what's going on, why some jobs are left incomplete or changed entirely in design, the details of how a couple of unknown new jobs came about, or what possible job is associated with the truck load of stuff that now takes up any spare space in the storage shed. Whatever the inconvenience, Island isn't about to care what others think, and isn't giving any answers, and is often blunt in making that point..

Half Wave:

Half Wave lives in a world where some people sound distorted, more so when these people are trying to be discrete and tell them about some office gossip, a cryptic heads up, or some other trifle. The behaviour is baffling to those who strike it and observe the differences, wondering why ordinarily a hushed whisper would be matched in kind, and yet when they approach Half Wave, their hushed tones are met with a loud questioning of what they said or simply rehashing so any idiot in the next room would understand perfectly, and often continues despite subtle hand gestures for them to speak quietly or more discretely. Victims of Half Wave, wonder if they are just hated, disliked, or if Half Wave is completely oblivious to their wishes to be discrete at times.
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The important thing is knowing who owns the fence

Techalert: Tech alert is constantly on the prowl for the latest bit of difficulty from customer or new employee simply so he can write long, disjointed postings on exact procedure for a piece of hardware or software and occasionally policy. He also enjoys spreading panic about the latest worm, virus, or other malware and will not let a hoax deprive him of the oppertunity to make those more gullible then himself nervous.

Tech Alert's tendencies are usually well known in the office and by management. Tech alert's one saving grace is usually that he simultaneously does something legitimately useful others are reluctant to do. He may, for example, write the product support manual, deal directly with large customer orders (such as by another corporation) ect.

At no point should you loan Tech alert a tool as he will often break it and blame "shoddy design".
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WeatherDork:

WeatherDork is someone who is a position to manage worker activities or under certain occasions, when a worker cleverly manages to hog shared tools and equipment during various weather episodes. WeatherDork may be just oblivious to the ideal working environment of their co-workers, and is happy to assign various tasks at times of the day, which are anything but ideal.

If the work involves field (outdoor) work, they are generally aware of regulations and wage entitlements for various extreme conditions, but will negate the couple of hours of hostile weather that arrives early each morning or in the heat of the day.

Those who work primarily indoors will curse WeatherDork for getting errands run at stupid times (the most inconvenient time to be outside typically) of the day or being inconsiderate for not altering the errands or lunch breaks to avoid the severe weather events which are approaching.

Where there are workspaces in smaller buildings, WeatherDork may have some authority with the thermostat, which is often set too low.

WeatherDork may be simply a worker who shares their employer's equipment or their own, but will continue working despite other co worker needs, effectively keeping equipment from a job that has a tight time frame, to be completed while the weather is fine or to simply securing a job from becoming subject to the worsening weather. WeatherDork has a knack to inflame others by announcing they are now finished and the equipment is free, usually at a point when it's obviously pointless and those completing other not so essential jobs while waiting, are simple paled beyond belief.

Priority:

Priority seems to think that if people aren't begging (with cream, a cherry and sugar on top) for them to do something else or let someone else have priority in the office, workshop, or other associated tool or machinery, then they should just stay with their pissant job. Priority often hears plenty of hints or requests and will often indicate they won't be long or that they can move onto something else. However, those who proceed to start their job will soon find using the same area uncomfortable, as Priority launches into loud, smelly or unclean activities beside them. Co-workers wonder if this is something deliberate or just a passive aggressive protest, which are a couple of reasons put forward for a computer room to have enough freshener sprayed about to be a fire hazard or why suddenly in the workshop, no one could think there without two pairs of earmuffs on.

DeckedOut:

No one really cares if DeckedOut is the type of person to carry around enough stuff on them in a tool belt or trade jacket, to tackle just about every job they'll ever encounter. DeckedOut certainly won't blow away in a wind gust and can be pretty handy around the place. Why a toolbox hasn't struck as a better alternative, is a topic their co-workers often ponder.

InUse:

InUse is very similar to DeckedOut, in as much as they like to have a collection of tools and other items handy. They are perhaps mimicking tradesmen who have their own service vehicle stocked with tools and materials for every type of job. InUse will happily junk up common work areas with a assortment of tools and materials. No one generally minds if a collection exists for a few days as it means there's some serious maintenance or particular job on the go. InUse though will make a collection of tools and materials, which could theoretically or possibly be used, but anyone who's undertaken a similar job, knows they only need a mere fraction that's been collected together. InUse is especially annoying when they have to use a business vehicle to travel to a job, and before they leave, the vehicle will be junked up, when they possibly only need a screwdriver kit. Maybe they just want to look the part, but their co-workers loathe them each time they need to use the same vehicle and spend an hour putting all the tools back and cleaning the vehicle.

Power Miser:

A twit who's happy for people to trip over things which are in the dark shadows. They simply don't understand that those who walk from bright sunshine won't be able to navigate safely around a darkened workspace or office block for a minute or so. No matter how many times someone twists their ankle or similarly catches their arm on a poorly lit sharp steel construction temporarily mothballed in one of shed bays, or even catches their knee on a new filing cabinet which was squeezed in along one of the office hallways, and each time they protests that some idiot has turned off one of the lights again, Power Miser will truly never get it. Power Miser is still caught up in the days before florescent lighting came about, and expensive injury suits, and think they're providing a great service.
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The important thing is knowing who owns the fence

The second thread to talk about the "people at work suggestion" thread.

Yes, the original was deleted sadly. I only just realised it was missing as well.
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The important thing is knowing who owns the fence

Huh.

Huh may be a competent worker within the scope of their own field, or many, but is missing some common sense or awareness about aspects of the job which needs at various times, some tricky navigation, caution or rather, some situations approached with "obvious heads up type communication" with all members of the team, the staff and from time to time, the general public. Sooner or later, Huh ends up in the middle of a story of a serious fowl up or why someone narrowly missed losing their life or a limb, simply because they can't think to open to their mouth or enact a simple cautionary procedure, that would typically occur to any other person who's around.
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The important thing is knowing who owns the fence

Glovebox:

An information sensor of the strangest order. May not be just a work mate, but a client, customer or someone in the building next door. There are a number of variations, but a couple are common. Typically, they are merely wanting to keep the upper hand in a single or many conversations involving a subject matter they were privy too and have the means to control what information can be retrieved from their "glovebox" of information. Perhaps some do this to protect themselves from a perception of cluelessness or their competitive nature drives them to keep back the details so they can "solve" it themselves when others have filled in the "minor" blank spots.

(i) If your job is to problem solve or fix issues, or you are the level headed employee that others come to for advice about day to day issues that pop up, you know you've met the most common type of Glovebox; when instead of simply being informative and spilling the beans as to what happened, they start playing a stalling game.

Though they seem like a kid who's trying not let slip something that will get them into trouble, they are clearly driven by a different motive. Perhaps they just like being the centre of attention for a moment while you try and sort out their problem or simply try and make make some sense of a strange set of happenings. After tedious efforts, you will begin to realise that yet another critical detail has been omitted from their story, and once again you need to tease out another nugget.

(ii) A more infuriating type will also hold back certain facts so it allows them to work on the problem and solve it in their own time, or worst case scenario, appear to be instrumental in solving it. They are driven by the idea they are intelligent, though sometimes you begin to feel they secretly think they're a lot more clever than those around them, their work mates, the people on the same street, and the entire business estate. Given they may be clever, they're not in complete self denial, as their insecurity prompts them to use the little opportunities, every little victory, to try and remind everyone just what a clever person they are.

Where they truly come into their own, is when by default, they can control some of the work area. The headaches will begin when you are probed or quietly requested to have a look at a problem that looks straight forward and simple, and ascertain / verify the cause, and possibly suggest a fix that should or seems like the best way forwards. Should you once more humour the idea you're "helping", and turn up to see what's wrong, you will typically find great difficulty in actually performing your usual steps of physically handling and manipulating the "problem." This can be quite frustrating on it's own, and still more so when they engage with other staff and public in talking down any musings you made on the limited amount of information you have. Even if Glovebox is clearly deep in over their head, they'll ignore your instructions on how to get a good diagnosis and even if they move in that direction, will do the unimaginable to try and upset the results. The "blockade" is merely a stalling process and a balancing act until you leave with no useful diagnosis but after they have probed you for all the better ideas on how to resolve it.

Glovebox may eventually evolve into someone with serious control issues around "no brainer" type problems, as these problems are something they can use to "prove" to the staff under them how "smart" they are. This is especially evident when they are away or on a RDO, and even the simplest of issues that Glovebox's staff can't resolve, that someone else could fix in a few minutes, will stay broken until their "heroic" return.

The only silver lining is that it might bring you closer to other co workers who've had similar experiences, and can have a good laugh about how preciously the idiot guards their glovebox.

Official:

Official likes to be important. They have a duty to keep every thing in order and ... maybe not to the greatest extent in their own workspace, but they certainly do enjoy casting their eyes over what EVERYONE else is doing. Official's activities aren't confined just to work either, as you will often find Official on the phone during a break, ringing the local authorities to squeak about all the latest things which are not in order. Official also gets a kick out of joining various local organisations that are part of essential services during emergencies.

Happy Hazard:

Happy Hazard is OCD gone wrong. Everything is about creating order in the work area where there was "none". They cheerfully pick up, move, clean, vanish all sorts of job related items. There appears to be no set rule, to when they'll choose to clean up and what they'll decide needs to be put away in an area that three out of ten times, no one else will be able to relocate without thoroughly pulling the workspace apart. They are immune to the whinges of the other employees who are livid that the project they left in the morning, requires another couple of hours setting up again. It is only that they are very qualified and useful that their repeat offenses are ignored or overlooked by the boss.
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The important thing is knowing who owns the fence

Keep going, most entertaining.
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"When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro."

Wordy Bore Joined: 08 Mar 2009 Posts: 314

I'm "the creepy guy at work" from the dane cook skit.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iqHZ8tCA_7s

My wife actually drew me once (she likes drawing) and I realized holy crap, she thinks I'm Shino. (The one depicted as the creepy guy) Laughing

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The mass, whether it be a crowd or an army, is vile.

THREAD NECROMANCY WARNING

Productivity Man/Team Sprit (whichever you prefer)

Held prisoner by personal phone calls? Never fear, Productivity Man is here! Simply put, Productivity Man is the boss who times your bathroom breaks, installs spyware on company electronics, and monitors all incoming and outgoing phone calls, e-mail, and text messages to make sure your home life isn't invading your work life. The content or lengnth of the offending communication does not matter. Call your wife for 20 seconds to tell her you're working late and you WILL be punished - and probably billed for it too.

Unfotunately, this boss has no problem with your work life invading your home life. He'll happily send you work-related stuff at all hours of the day or night (weekends too), call you just to chat as if he were your friend and not your boss, and punish you, officially or unofficially, for not going to "happy hour" or pursuing off-duty relationships with co-workers. Rest assured he WILL friend you on Facebook just to make sure you don't have any unhealthy eating or drinking habits, dangerous hobbies, or discontent with your job or work environment (of course, he gets upset if you turn him down or de-friend him).

If you haven't perfected the art of lying to stay out of trouble, this guy might convince you to learn in a hurry. If you don't want to lie, perhaps for religious reasons, you should at least delete any and all accounts at major social networks quickly before he finds them.

nice and I know that type. You've reminded me of another type.

Clueless Lifer

Clueless Lifer is typically a boss who is focused on keeping a business of one or more interests up and running seven days a wee, and is often driven by the jobs which have prospects of being excellent money earners. Through their heavy work load, and other management activities involved with running various daily activities of their employees they slowly forget most people don't plan or want to work more than nine hours a day, let alone putting in an average or eleven or more hours a day. seven days a week. They forget most workers are paid on an hourly basis with no other rewards or benefits other than bringing in an extra few bucks each week. They fail to realise there is a cut off point where workers realise that no amount of money is worth not having a life outside work.

Clueless Lifer is often heard about the workplace indignantly lamenting why one of their workers have taken off "early" to pursue some social activity or have opted to take the weekends off or a short holiday every once and a while.
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The important thing is knowing who owns the fence

Bump for great justice
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"When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro."

Is Innocent

Is Innocent is never near anything when it went wrong, in fact often Is Innocent hasn't been near that area for months. Is Innocent never needed any bits in the workplace that have been misplaced. Is Innocent knows nothing about any mischief or stuff ups in the workplace, and wasn't aware of it ... truly ... until they were asked about it. Is Innocent is often full of it, and has a poor memory of the little things they say and do, or more precisely hopes that no one remembers such small oddly cryptic throw away comments. Is Innocent is marked, be it heavily disguised, of having little respect for materials allocated to someone else's project and no thought to ask anyone if it might be allocated. Sometimes Is Innocent simply acquires these materials for "extracurricular" training or "non work related" jobs off site, where they can be moderately sure no one from work will ever see or notice.

Troublemonger

Troublemonger varies in characteristic depending on factors at the place of work and if they are partners in business or in agriculture as a share farmer. Troublemonger generally has good job security and is an expert in sharing and repeating problems in the workplace to those who were criticized or scapegoated, mostly with an intent of inflicting the most damage they can. There are a few modes, from sharing bilaterally and watching the workplace become a war zone of snide remarks and noncooperation, to singling out or preferencing just a few and creating a hell zone just for those they feel threatened by or who they don't like. It's not uncommon for Troublemonger whip out their creative license and paint a much worse picture than what actually was said or did occur. In share farming where there is often separate workforces for individual farmers which from time to time work under other farmers in the group, and mirrored where this situation is a business between partners with different bosses, Troublemonger has an advantage to be creative as they like. The eventual outcome is division between work groups and hostility to one partner or farmer, and usually with lower respect for one boss partner or farmers, where liberties can be taken and excused. Troublemonger's main agenda is believed to be so that they can operate and take liberties much more freely at the work site without much or as much attention, if at all.
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The important thing is knowing who owns the fence

I seem to be bumping into people lately and being further reminded of some of the idiots in the world I've encountered.

Credit

Credit always puts in an effort to make sure everyone knows they worked on a project, so that either others or just the bosses know how instrumental they were and typically play down everyone else's role involved with a job to build or fix something. Credit has a couple of variations that stand on their own, Hero and I Didz It

Hero

Hero is intent to make sure that everyone can see the evidence of the "hard" toil. This is typically where evidence can be seen in its physical form, like rubbish generated from a job is piled separately and stored and not immediately binned.

Hero also uses "size of job" as a means to highlight their hero status. Some jobs due to various problems, may have to bypass modern luxury of a machine to make the job quicker and easier, and involve a lot physical exertion. While many workers are keen to see a machine do this work, and make smart decisions like if it's quicker to do it by hand for a small job then why not, (though will often complain of being worn out,) Hero will choose the physically toiling method preferentially so they can gloat how hard they have worked and point out the big job they did, that way. Hero will argue the merits of doing it by the slower method despite clear evidence that it isn't cost effective. Hero practically never does a job the hard way if no one will ever know or care how they did this work.

I Didz It

I Didz It is typically though not always, a mix of Credit and Landscaper. I Didz It has various states. They may be as benign as someone who tags (initials in a significant manner) any simple job that comes their way for final construction or a mundane repair after someone has diagnosed and ordered the necessary parts. Their tags of oversized initials in notable areas infers they built it, and will often be heard to take credit for the whole project.

The more extreme form of I Didz It probably has a poor memory, narcissistic or both, and issues usually occur long after most people would remember who did what except for the few sods who really did put a lot of effort and time into a project.

The extreme form of I Didz It will argue black and blue how they wholly and solely are responsible, despite, not being responsible to purchase the parts and materials to build it, no knowledge of any of the problems that occurred during the prototyping stages and subsequent materials to rectify issues, when in fact they're only contribution was to Landscape the project, either by tidying up the prototype, prettying up the job or add some marginal functionality, often at a cost of less than 0.5 percent of overall cost of the project and fraction of the time invested prior to their involvement. The Extreme I Didz It generally only stays at their job if they are the boss, silent partner, or relative, though they can exist for long periods where they are for whatever reason too busy to talk about "their" great deeds.
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The important thing is knowing who owns the fence

Clueless Newb Joined: 02 May 2011 Posts: 29

NSLI (Narcissistic Sociopath Lost It) or Sad Sad Panda

Be thankful you'll only typically see such a person at a working bee, as a volunteer during a crisis etc, as they only exist at the workplace for a short period of time. NSLI pops into being usually with a bang, when finally a narcissistic and or sociopathic person feels or realises all their manipulation, machinations, schemes and persistent attempts at brainwashing hasn't fulfilled their grand ambitions and fate (usually directly as a result of karma) has dealt them a cruel hand.

In a last ditch effort, NSLI will resort to childish ploys to try and gain some sympathy and or a free hand once again to get away with what they can. When tantrums don't work and time moves on, eventually their baseline behaviour establishes Typically or notably this means a very public display of how unhappy they are along with their "woe is me," "why me," "how unfair" stories. In good form they resemble a panda that's visibly not happy with what's been served up, turning their nose up and dismissing attempts that miss the mark because it doesn't suit them, and should they realise they've got the upper hand every once and a while ... well people quickly find they are a bear after all. Accompanying that, they are often heard stating quite plainly how very sad they are, almost in the same demeanour as a child, with the sulky face twisting on the spot with no idea what do next or at other times moping about when it, what ever it is, doesn't go their way. They are a sad sad Panda for sure.

Fool's Gold Miner.

A workmate who's only worried about their own, work crew's or company's interests, with little regard to the great damage or drama to acquire seemingly worthless gains. FGM disregard for others almost defies belief at times and will think nothing of encumbering other people about the workplace or the wider community. FGM will have the tress cut where most members eat outside in summer under their shade because they weren't happy with the amount of sunlight at 8 in the morning or unable to have a clear view from their window at the world passing by. FGM will campaign to have funds diverted to concrete a perfectly good bitumen pathway, while the maintenance staff are already going without. FGM will insist that a room housing moisture sensitive test or monitoring equipment be for once properly cleaned with water. FGM will allow contaminated fill to be sent to a development site which is clean fill only. FGM will have the dirty work vehicles cleaned down where the cleaning mist will drift over other shop fronts, often permanently staining the paintwork. FGM clearly doesn't care if what they do, bothers and incurs costs to others.
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The important thing is knowing who owns the fence

Nuke

Though Nuke shares some similarity to Huh, it is in a very different way.

Nuke may or may not be good what they do, but what defines Nuke are the pockets of scorched earth they leave behind they leave behind by the time they have finished their job, though it may not be all too apparent in the short term.

Examples range from; merely ruined landscape on a neighboring property Nuke for whatever reason didn't see, which you know you'll either be paying to fix or spending a few mucky days helping fix; the missing line of survey pegs the survey team have spent a month placing, after Nuke was sent out to grade a better road for the team; re concreting a days work because Nuke added far too much retardant to the concrete mix; to finding months later after Nuke has accidentally comprised the foundation of the workplace structure and now you're stuck between looking for a new job as the company has cut your hours as they deal with the problem.

Nuke might not be a genius but they sure find some of the best ways to make normal work life all but difficult in some parts of the workplace .
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The important thing is knowing who owns the fence

Guzzle

Not often seen, Guzzle is the opposite of Miser. Guzzle has no real idea how little costs all add up and operates like everything costs only a few cents and there is so much money about under the office floor boards there's no worries what so ever.

Guzzle will use a 4 gallon drum of solvent where the average worker would use a cup full with a bit of care and extra manual labour to clean down some parts, a swimming pool full of water to wash a car, and so much adhesive it spills out the sides of the job they are gluing that it again needs another gallon of solvent to clean up where the typical worker would have little in anything to clean up.

Guzzle typically uses so much product their boss will wonder if Guzzle isn't creating some rift and simply escaping into some other dimension where all the socks are.

Howlee aka Violin player.

Like a dog that howls to get attention, Howlee is typically found in small family run businesses, as their antics would be in vain anywhere else. Howlee is generally the person who "owns" the business, or thinks they're in charge, though not always. Due to their inefficiency or ineffective decision making, they can't afford to employ staff to carry out all their little wants, or the bare minimum employed staff simply refuse to chase up some fanciful, wishful and often stupid idea that's a little outside their job description.

Howlee resorts to engaging in long mournful sad sob stories with siblings or their own children, nephews, nieces, etc, they believe, or have in the past had success on getting them on board their "wish list." Their "wish list" is typically no small task, and in most cases it is practically a full time job for weeks.

Howlee doesn't care if (though they might say otherwise) those who respond to their howls, already full time jobs or are in fact studying fulltime, and the fact they cut work or simply come back to help out temporarily means they have to stop studying. In fact, Howlee will get upset if their unpaid minions are late because they needed to catch up on something called sleep every once and a while seemingly oblivious to their minions efforts to put in 10 hours elsewhere before coming to the business after hours for another 10 hours to build, fix, or complete whatever was on the "wish list."

Howlee looks down on those who are smart enough and realistic enough to realize (or perhaps due to past experience) that it won't really change a thing and in a couple of years, as at some point it will all fall into disrepair or be simply abandoned after a year for yet another fanciful project arrives to do the same thing but "better." Howlee is only really happy when people are wasting their time dedicated to some half witted dream of an idea that's theirs.
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The important thing is knowing who owns the fence

Robin Hood's Sycophant

RHS is a bizarre workmate and "generally" exists at less than secure work sites, or a work site that has non secured items outside their business that would be viewed to have a very low risk of theft. Other less than secure work sites are temporary work areas in a remote areas too distant to be of interest or worthwhile to rob due to travel costs or a large rural or remote property. Over a period of time the boss, employees in general or just one employee will find that odd items are no longer about and strange that no one knows anything about it, as it doesn't look like a typical break and enter theft. It's obvious that someone light fingered is about, either vising during work hours or making repeat night entries.

Eventually over time, RHS will come out of the woodwork more and more to raise points to counter any upset individuals making comments in regard to items going missing; like that these materials are easily replaced or to stop fuming, as it won't do any good, along with touting a view it's most likely just misplaced. Strikingly RHS is opposed to implementing better securing methods like fencing or lockers as the perceived inconvenience outweighs the the small things that go missing. It is unknown (apparently this circumstance hasn't been observed ... yet) what RHS would say in the event a large hard to miss item were to go missing. RHS doesn't seem to realise one bit, that their continual "defense" of some unknown element in the workplace looks very very incriminating, especially when they're playing down the loss of a small item worth a days' wage, which is not likely insured but totally dismissive of the effort involved to replace the item with the same or something as good, which can take time.
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The important thing is knowing who owns the fence

I don't know how I ever missed this one. One of the more annoying types around the work place.

Donkey

Donkey may be hard working at times, but it is stubborn, and at times stupid. Donkey is often transfixed by small things that the average person would quickly dismiss, disregard as a nonsense or something which is purely trivial in nature.

When there is a problem, you can be sure to hear Donkey hee hawing away, coming up with reasons and explanations why what and how something went wrong, much may be on track, but at various times, not, and when required, should anyone try to explain to Donkey their theory is no better than some of the other ideas it's pulled out of it's arse lately, Donkey will protest, smack its lips with disdain or continue hee hawing but louder and sometimes with menace. There's no telling Donkey, it'll convince itself later it was right, right after it forgets how wrong it was.
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The important thing is knowing who owns the fence

The Disfranchiser:

The Disfranchiser doesn't like some people ... especially those who might be a threat, those who are smart and worldly enough to note their ulterior motives and shortcomings, or otherwise, those once aware of some typically ill thought out concept, aren't slow or shy to speak up and expose and dismiss these ideas / plans / goals / etc for what they are.

The Disfranchiser, who has most likely been thwarted a number of times, craftily sets about to employ a number of tactics over weeks if not months, manipulating fellow workers and higher personnel , to disfranchise the "thorns" in their midst.

Once confident they have set the field with fellow workers, the Disfranchisercan start to challenge their "thorns" directly when they are announcing "big ideas" by planning a number of strategies which will ultimately shift the topic immediately in almost every instance to the "thorn's" non conformity with the rest of the workforce ... they don't wash ... they smell ... they're talking loud ... they're being hostile towards them ... please don't shout at me ... language ... Evidently yes, whatever point that might work to derail every general conversion they then have with their "thorns" will be trotted out, every time their mouths have to stop moving and they might be required to listen to the "thorn" for even a second. However jumping on normal voice inflections like emphasis is quite effective, especially when the "thorn" has grown tired of patiently listening to find within seconds of expressing their point of view, they are being basically shot down by being side tracked with stupid, often ludicrous comments of the Disfranchiser and their tight group of friends.

Disfranchiser doesn't always operate in the same fashion. They may simply resort to "being offended" by some little thing without saying much to their "thorn" and leave immediately with a couple of hot cryptic comments but complain bitterly behind the scenes, or prep themselves to just machine gun fire off what they need or want to say rapidly as they are waling off to make themselves scarce before the "thorn" can question or clarify other matters, or if stuck at a desk just insist over and over after spending a couple of minutes yapping ... they don't have time, yes they will spend ten minutes insisting whatever rather than spend 10 seconds to answer a simple question.

A common trait however is Disfranchiser is known for trying to remove or play down the importance of the "thorn's" knowledge, usefulness, position, respect or even function within the workplace.

Some favoured tactics (in some instances) is either the "blowhard" pseudo-blowhard" or "counter-blowhard" to try and discredit those who don't have any formal qualifications in the field of interest..

In some respect, they operate like they have a Superiority complex in regard to their "thorns" and so may have a mild Superiority complex in general.

[Blowhard - see the online warrior type. Pseudor-blowhard, is a real life tactic employed by those who are qualified in some field or some manner, but don't rely on it specifically, but surely don't forget to point out since their opponent doesn't have any formal qualification their knowledge is "questionable" as they weren't intelligent enough to go to college. Counter -blowhard is the argument - any information tendered not directly under a formal qualification in that specific field hasn't any more credibility than any Tom, Dick or Harriot has to offer.
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The important thing is knowing who owns the fence

Token Tin Man

In rarefied environments, and perhaps the weirdest of circumstances, may be responsible for the advent of Token Tin Man.

To the outsider and those new to these casual workplaces, one might be slowly led to assume the Token Tin Man has sort of odd condition, perhaps Asperger's Syndrome, mild autism, a neurological deficiency, or something else. For the most part, any of their existing atypical mannerisms plays into this idea, no partner to speak of and apparently too tired after work to have a life. The idea is also reinforced by other workers who assume one of their tasks is ensure Token Tin Man is doing their job. However under a critical eye, TTM barely has time to straighten up from one task before someone is commenting that they're not working or perhaps that there another task which needs to be done pronto. Should TTM be on a flat rate of pay reward, TTM may work all hours of the day and into the night.

In may be obvious to an outsider that there's something wrong with the outlook of the entire workplace mindset, as a bunch can stand around chatting hour on end to visitors or make idle chit chat, while TTM endlessly works away in the background, but should TTM make the mistake to take a short drink break and join in with a couple of comments, they will often enough be actively ignored until someone directs TTM towards they job they should be doing.

It's for this reason alone, TTM may have a reputation in the general area where they live and work, for not being a very convincing liar, for generally feigning either surprise or little knowledge about any incidents or gossip about the workplace or the general locality they weren't directly involved with..

The Token Tin Man can instill a rush of mixed emotions in a person, once the penny drops, and it's clear to them in actuality Token Tin Man is the not a piece of programed hardware they're painted to be, which is supposed to tirelessly work except for perscribed breaks where they should cycle down awaiting further instructions. The strange behavioural traits are simply explained as a consequence of being actively isolated by by fellow workers and being reactive to the larger mindset of those around the ridges as a perception ripples though the wider community.

A guess as to why it all came about would be one or any number of workers noted TTM's more disciplined work ethic and took advantage of it, and in course of a few months, and the lack of complaining, they simply rode TTM harder. However chatting to TTM in confidence and analysing various events, suggest that one or more workers took an immediate and intense but veiled dislike to TTM and conspired to freeze TTM out. TTM may express frustration at the amount of work that's placed on their plate and the rubbishing they get at times when they "forget themselves" and make typical and perfectly normal conversation, indirectly being painted as someone who's defective and emotionally stunted and there fore not qualified enough when it's related to personal relationships and other human type things.
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The important thing is knowing who owns the fence

Abracadabra

Slight of hand, certainly, but not available for party or function entertainment.

Abracadabra is a little thief of sorts, skilled at swapping items at work or other work places for similar ones they have that are busted, worn out, or nearly empty. The presence of one or more Abracadabras may force an anal retentive knee jerk by staff by implementing a sophisticated anti theft marking system, having grown tired that "supposedly" new, regularly tested or fully functional items seem to have "suddenly" had an "unfortunate" lifespan. Strikingly, despite excuses, the original item never seems to turn up, and no satisfactory reason as to why it was not surrendered for a warranty claim or other action. The purchasing officer or equivalent, is probably the first to realise something if wrong.

Some Abracadabras are so brazen as to not even try to hide that a different item is being substituted, and will slowly swap out gear for busted stuff, making up excuses, if any one has noticed, like the original failed and was unworkable which explains the presence of the "spare," especially if they have to take gear off site. A cunning and bold Abracadabra, may not be an actual employee, but someone who visits the work site on an irregular basis to carry out a job and may just "accidentally" take something they thought was theirs, sometimes not even bothering to bring a substitute.

The experienced Abracadabra has a patient practice of swapping gear around all the time if they can, the frequent swapping allows them to plead innocence by way of feigning ignorance, and put on a show that (most if not all) a high percentage of stuff they use is actually still there. The constant swapping, like a game of coconut shells, keeps everyone distracted, and many would surely assume the newer items are stored away for when the older gear breaks or when a neat outcome is required. However the high frequency of swapping back and forth should act as a warning.

It's not unheard of, depending on the industry, the purchasing officer mortified to find a good proportion of items considered unnecessary or impractical to mark like electrical leads, water hoses, welding gear, (especially) minor hand tools, power boards, desk lights, special light bulbs, chairs, even tables, to have been substituted for some worn out, damaged or inferior product.

Way Short

Way Short is in the same family as Dead Weight and Donkey While they may be very competent in a particular skill set, they demonstrate complete ineptness or lack or judgment in other areas. Outside of their narrow field of expertise, they are viewed as infinitely optimistic in their approach and efforts to undertake a job, and often, like Dead Weight, undoing the good work of others and a Donkey in respect that they won't listen to reason. Way Short is typically at their most annoying when they decide to undertake a task they've set themselves, and it's probable that at one stage of their life they might have formed an "idea" of who to do it from watching what went on around them in previous jobs. Seeing is not the same as knowing.

(I've noted this myself with road crew workers here, - they have driven trucks for years, or some other job involved with minor road maintenance, and at some point they think they are an expert on road engineering, usually with "ideas' which fly in the face of simple logic. I'm sure a number of them have little idea how to really build an all weather road, though they do know how to build something that looks like one. [eg, Like blaming a impassable boggy low spot in a road, on poor drainage due to the lack of a sufficient drain on a high ridge / hill some distance away... wtf, it's not like the top end of the world might think, water here downunder still flows downhill you know Very Happy

and no, the "better" drain wasn't to divert water away from the lower section of road.] )

The Gaslighter (aka Minister of Nasty Tricks ) and the Gaslighting Suspect

As things go, things can always get worse, such as, the arrival of a Gaslighter. Underpinning much of their modus operandi is "generally" a level of sociopathy, but there are those who fall outside being a mere sociopath. There may be no logical reason, but there exists a strong perception by Gaslighter that one or a number of people deserve to be tormented psychologically. Thus they set about the workplace "gaslighting" as per the given psychological definition.

Wikipedia

What fresh hell is that?
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"When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro."

Pest Keeper

Vermin don't have it easier, than to find a nice place where they are protected and food is a plenty. Pest Keeper who is either the foreman or boss doesn't hold whatever pest that is plaguing the worksite as problematic, no, not at all. Luckily many work areas are within city limits pest maintenance and monitoring done by its department of Public Health, so most vermin don't get too out of hand. But smaller insect pests can slip under the radar.

The flea is probably one of the most notable of Pest Keeper's permanent guests, due to common hosts like dogs, often the bosses pet or the guard dog.

Rather than do anything, Pest Keeper will often oppose anyone else purchasing an approved product to tackle the problem ... because there isn't one. They are known to invent a host of reasons why the pest isn't a problem. Eg. Fleas don't jump off of a dog ... any fleas will be on the dog. This merely angers the worker(s), who, if wearing (or resorting to) shorts, can look down below their knees and see a peppered black mat at various times of the day.

Edit. 15 March

I though this type might have just been incidental, and decided to skip it, but this week I can actually say I've seen this type move their "feeding station" around to ... under other people's noses in a pretty obvious fashion.

Possibly just a sub type.

Feed Attendant.

Among other things this worker likes to feed local and native animals around the workplace. It seems to make them happy, if not a bit odd, but they seem to have an "unfortunate' habit to put out food in "certain" places, which will ultimately leave the surrounding area around the impromptu food station covered in a 'mess."

They're the worker who feeds the pigeons only where the "smokers" like to assemble on their break, in a rural settings, choose to feed the chickens, turkeys or whatever, only in the areas where those who have fallen out of favour have to work.

2nd edit 8 April to add Feed Attendant
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The important thing is knowing who owns the fence

Stinker

Stinker shares some similarities to Roach and Priority in regard to unnecessarily contaminating the workplace or the air around it with either foul smelling or poisonous substances.

In all likelihood there actions are probably a passive aggressive response as well as a degree of laziness.

Though they should by all means know better, they will pollute the work environment little differently than a worker plucked from the Industrial Revolution period. They apparently pay little regard to the recognised correct disposal techniques as they "dispose" of highly poisonous substances by pouring liquids down drains or similarly solid items in open weather for them to wash into local waterways.

Stinker often has a fondness for burning things, with the resulting fumes infusing into the walls and porous items. One can only guess their fondness for fires, but generally it's not a pyromaniac that prefers a smoldering stinking mass over a cleaner burning well oxygenated fire. Stinker will claim a range of excuses, and may well have the boss wrapped around their finger with outright lies about what they supposedly burned.

Stinker has more of a free hand when their job takes them off site to residential areas. They think nothing of setting fires to any waste that has previously accumulated and awaiting collection. Any other worker could probably easily load up the couple of wheelbarrow loads before Stinker could set a fire. A really over the top Stinker who presumably their boss has no objection to them cleaning up by such means, will not let rain or snow get in the way, using gallons of gas or oil or even an old tyre to ensure the wet mass burns ... eventually.

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The Sneaky Lurker

This is mostly an underlying characteristic in various types of workers and would for the most part never be noted as the primary characteristic. For example, a Sneaky Dog would certainly be noted to have many of the notable characteristics of a Sneaky Lurker

The Sneaky Lurker is a plotter and schemer whilst keeping a rather benign presence within the workplace, with the possible exception of those who the Sneaky Lurker conspires with.

A few main variations can be observed, the main ones being:

(i)These types most likely have aspirations of being important, and thus their machinations are to compensate, as they play secret agent and quietly and artfully manipulate circumstance and influence what goes on around the work place. Sometimes mistaken for a Climber.

(ii)The sneaky information gatherer and or action coordinator within and involving the workplace. Motivation can be financial gain in some manner, simply to gain favour with someone they consider important or it may be to just sure up their position (in the long run) within the work place.

(iii) A common sub type that has criminal connections, and it may be just that they do or used to "retail" various drugs to some workers there, but regardless they always keep out a roving eye for items that could be "useful" or sensitive information that could be very useful to the underworld of crime.

At times the Sneaky Lurker may be just someone loosely associated with one of the workers or business owners, seemingly able to access most parts of the business with little cause of alarm.

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The Order of:- The Secret Society of Super Turkeys.

A loose Collective within the workplace, though one can exist with just a Supreme Turkey with the unwitting aid and cooperation from other "nicer" workers and staff within the workplace, who would also be defined as being part of the collective. It can be truly difficult to correctly classify whether individuals are truly part of the Order.

Super Turkeys are primarily motivated (though this may not be easily observed) by the idea the workplace, or other people (even one person) working there, owes them a living. Sometimes it is the belief one of their fellow Super Turkeys are owed a living, being somehow "tricked" out of a great fortune or something to that effect It is the latter belief why many otherwise good workers "move to the dark side."

On the most part, Super Turkeys would seem hard to pin down, and could present without any context, a range from innocent good work type to merely an "unpleasant" work type right up to a composite of a various characteristics of narcissists and and sociopaths.

Stinkingly, the presence of one will often signal the formation of a whole nest of Super Turkeys., who may or may not conspire with each other to "have their way." However Super Turkeys are generally first noted as a collective, as they, in (unintended) unison, plunder and create havoc for the workplace or particular individuals, flagging and dispelling any idea of "coincidence" for the more savvy individuals, now aware, however improbable, there's a little conspiracy underfoot.

Undoubtedly Super Turkeys are easy to spot when emerging from the woodwork, having grown in confidence over time and finally working together as a group, the rambunctious group will often move off to a quiet corner for spontaneous "meetings" and an ominous still noted when "other workers" pass within clear earshot. Anyone who actually goes over to see what the "meeting" is about will be met with a pretense the discussion is actually something else "work related." Even so out in the open, each believes no one else is aware what they're actually doing.

Openness can also be spontaneous, like when suddenly their easy going "holiday" is threatened at their "work" place by the arrival of a new supervisor or if the company has been bought out or merged with another.

An obvious and one of the worst Secret Society of Super Turkeys is also particularly noted in Share Farming operations, where employees or relatives of one of the principle farmers feel "entitled" to use whatever, whenever they like, as well as pocketing any loose products of value, if they so desire. Their unruly behaviour is unchecked due to a farming venture generally being widespread and the fact they can often come and go unnoticed. Motivation in some of the worst examples may at times be due to "tall poppy syndrome", where the "target" is perceived to have got where they are easily, and if the case, Super Turkeys will also "accidentally" destroy items solely to cause their "target" a financial burden, generally in a manner that can not be recouped by insurance, as well as taking smaller parts of equipment away to discard ... somewhere no one looking for them will ever find.

Such an example, when Super Turkeys are sure they really don't have to operate with any care in regard to their "target" is:

Instead of using a bit of rope to pull a reasonable light "shared" item to an easily accessible area, will drive in (with a tractor) the wrong way giving them an excuse to smash up what ever is in their way so they can hook up directly.

If the "target" is building, invent a reason that requires them to drive past ... and over the new building material.

If bailing hay is part of operations, get in first to use a baler after it has undergone seasonal maintenance, and proceed to keep using it (even contracting elsewhere) until it is almost too late for the "target" to make use of it, and by its return, requiring a complete overhaul.

(Each example sounds quite weird, but they're actually for real. In the case of building materials being run over, apparently the "target's " distress was dismissed and blame leveled at the "target" and not the idiot???)
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Possible Troller Joined: 17 Mar 2012 Posts: 102

All these different characteristics are fascinating. Reminds me of "Mission Impossible".
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Mind Job

Mind Job is a rare character who stands out as being someone who believes they are the unwavering authority in regard to what other or certain work staff have done or have brought at their own expense to the job, mostly resulting in hostile disagreement with the affected staff member. The problem is Mind Job has a very skewed view of the work place and perhaps the rest of the world, and make claims which often border on ridiculous, like stating you've only ever brought a singular white board marker over the years for the office when in fact it's far more frequent. They often have quite a belligerent attitude, due in part to a mild personality disorder and their continuing susceptibility to Wishful Thinking. (Wishful thinking in simple terms, is when someone assumes what they would prefer to be true, is in fact the case.)

Mind job no doubt is important to the work place otherwise their tooth and nail antics would quickly see them reprimanded or worse. The affected workers are generally dumb founded why some nutjob would consider themselves an authority on all the little aspects of their work, when often enough Mind Job isn't about to see in the first place, even if it's well known much of the work done after hours or in periods where it was weeks of long overtime.
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Boobs

Not really a dunce, but they're the person supposedly who's in charge who conveniently doesn't know anything any time anyone's asking. Almost always the team under them are ruthless, cut-throat, shoddy, sneaky or some other less desirable characteristic. The team under or around Boobs can practically do their worst as long as the team's work seems to be getting done, as any complaints directed to Boobs is less effective than telling some toothless tiger. Boobs in some form sanctions the methods, and often found making little gestures that they just don't care that much if customers or other departments in the company are unhappy how they did things or if the team created some incidental damage.

Boobs can be a real headache when they are in a large company and their efforts continually annoy the work efforts in other areas.

Boobs and their team, in all likelihood have not had a job where the customer would actually pursue every little convenient "mishap" through the courts.
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The important thing is knowing who owns the fence