Joined: 01 Jan 2005
The Power-Drunk Administrator" - Your "Administrator" type was described as the strongest warrior of them all, but in reality, what you usually have in the Power-Drunk Admin. It's his board and he makes the rules, and everyone knows he rules with an iron fist - but he's a weak warrier and he only keeps his feared status through his dictatorial practices. He works Machiovelian machinations on his subjects, employing a nobility of like-mined warriors as royals to fight for him and occasionally bringing in unscrupulous mercenaries to do his dirty work if a challenge rises to his authority. Big dogs and other strong warriors won't hang around in a suffocating forum like this - it'll usually be a pitiful, unhealthy kingdom of newbies, sycophants, blowhards and idle yuk yuks. The only warrier that can stand up to the dictator is the rebel leader. He'll employ the power of the kung-fu masters (assuming the cause is righteous) as lutenants and generous ranks of idelouges as soldiers in an all-out revolution. If he succeeds in out-flaming the powerful royal stooges the power-drunk admin is brought down easily. He then throws a tantrum and bans everyone. This usually results in a dead forum with cyber-tumbleweeds blowing in the wind at which point the admin, all glory lost, drifts forlorn from forum to forum as a "lonely guy", "imposter" and "xenophobe". At some point he either goes insane from the torment of existence and turns into a "Loopy" shadow of his former self, or he learns from his experience, and becomes a bitter, cynical "Jerk".
"The l33t" You must know everything about l33ts if you've been to a lot of forums no? They're way of spelling everything and slow wit. "S8p d00d?" I think they would qualify as a caegory of forumers pretty well, I've known a few true l33ts, but I'm only a wannabe one. :B Well, it's just a suggestion,
How about Shorthand? Similar to, yet different from Garble, Shorthand insists on using obscure abbreviations for every possible word, refusing to write anything out in its full form. Example: im sik n tired of u ppl thnk u no evrythng, y u not just stfu n get of the bord i h8 u, roflmao, u suk Shorthand is a very common but not particularly powerful Warrior. His attacks lack power, but can often goad more easily agitated Warriors, and especially Gramarrian, into a frenzied assault.
Do you have a Justifier yet? This is one who can trace the history of all posts back to the Pleistocene, and show his own posts to be innocent and perfectly correct, while demonstrating in minute detail that opponents are wrong, misled, etc. He(she) does this by quoting ad nauseum from the posts themselves, from the forum rules, from any authoritative literature pertinent to the forum, and by ignoring anything that conflicts with the picture he paints of his own perfection. One guestbook comment was about "dark characters", but they always stand out more than the vast majority of nice folks.
have you ever heard of the terrorist, which is what i would call him. i've seen a few of those. what they do is try to collect info on their enemy, then threaten to use this info for blackmail purposes, either sending it to the police, neighbors, wife, etc. in an effort to get them to back off and leave the board, or them alone.
I was just wondering if you considered generational aspects in compiling this list. I'm not sure where I fit on it, honestly, but I have noticed in my own pokings that there are most def the Old School and New School netizens, and they tend to behave very differently. What they write about, how frequently they write, how they write. I can tell someone who is from the previous generation (of BBSes and Usenet) from someone in the ranks of my own generation (of online journaling, homepages for all, and warez sites). Perhaps what your list needs is a "GenX" or "CyberPunk" warrior: one without any real origin or den, without any real cause beyond learning and self-education, who states their ideas whether or not it pisses other users off but always allowing for that reaction, and one who, although s/he may have some familiarity w/the ppl or types of ppl, is not neccessarily familiar w/the terrain. Very nearly misanthropic, but there none-the-less. They know enough to get around where a lot of others can't; but not so much that they're wizards or masters. Oh, and they can find out anything they want to know about anything that may strike their fancy in a matter of hours via online sources.
'Happy Are Those Who Mourn'
I've encountered a kind of 'Happy Are Those Who Mourn' which I couldn't identify from your prodigious list: every piano that was ever dropped landed on this chap's wife, each of his children was in turn run over by a steam roller, or swalloded an iron or been blown up by trying to smoke dynamite. If you make a witty hyperbolical remark, it's happened to one of this bloke's family and you are left in no doubt -though it is not said- that your comments were cruel and thoughtless. Ah, but could anyone really have been attacked by bees whilst in the bath? Dare you question him? Once more unto the beach my friends!
There are 3 I ran into while I was on a Yahoo chat. 1 was the Protected Species, which is a flame warrior that may be a newbie, a target, an invader (explained below), a mercenary witholding his attacks, or he just may be just a guest of a royal with no ill will. A protected species main attack is that he/she tries to push the idea that it would be rude to flame off against him/her, yet when their back is turned, they throw off a super-flame to the opponant. The Protected species doesn't stay on the protected list very long and usually evolves into a jerk.
Your wife dies after a man assulted her. You announce it to the board or room. The royals greive. The Troglodyte puts down his biases and greives with you. Even your rival deulist puts down the sword. Cheap shotter proceeds to make fun of the assult, get into your head and run you off the board just because they caught you at your weakest. Usually, cheap s
3. The invaders:
Invaders are different from mercenaries (Warriors brought in from other boards to help in a war.) or protected species. They usually find a site on a search engine, see they dislike the topic, and then proceed to start a flame war in the room or board. Usually, the invadees are armed to the teeth and send the invaders packing, leaving the forum the same as it was. But once in a while, an invader could evolve into a Godzillia, but that happens only when the invadees are uneducated.
Basically, he's a drive-by summarizer/troller. He waits until a flame war is done, then summarizes all the arguments in one horribly sarcastic, satirical post. Then he disappears for three months.
One I might personally add is the "Terminal patient" who has cancer/AIDS/etc. (or has a significant other who has it) - and then using the sickness as an excuse to be a total inconsiderate jerk! When someone tries to attack him back its "I have life threating *cancer* how daaaare you insult me" ;-) Keep up the good work :)
GEEZER No matter what the situation, whatever problem, anything new and exciting, or any argument, the GEEZER has seen it all before and is more than willing even eager to tell the rest of us all about how things were different or the same, awhile back when they were a little whippersnapper knee-high to a cricket. Very useful for piercing and deflating FILIBUSTER & PROFUNDUS-MAXIMUS, also good for impressing the NEWBIES by remembering all these blasts from the past. Can be mean-spirited to in-laws & descendants however is quite vulnerable to NET-RATS & FRAGILE-FEMMES. also known as: GEEZER-BOB, OLD-GEEZER or gender specific for females would be GEEZER-ETTE or GRANNY-GERT
I think if I had to describe my flame warrior type it would be something like "Wolf Trap". Doesn't instigate a confrontation and is perfectly harmless until stepped in. Then it sinks in deep with razor sharp teeth and is immune to all struggling. Will not let go until it's opponent bleeds to death, passes out from exhaustion, or chews off its own limb to escape.
Joined: 01 Jan 2005
What about Backpedaller (sp?)? Backpedaller clearly states his viewpoint often with strong wording but when push comes to shove any many other warriors have started beating him to a pulp he responds with "Oh, you mis-read what I meant. I clearly didn't say that in my initial post" and then proceeds to try and back his way out of his statements.
How about a "foreigner" Warrior? These are the ones whose English skills are just a little bit off, and it throws most all the other warriors off of their attack, because it divides them between the unforgiving types who crucify the "foreigner" for every little miscommunication, and the others who aren't sure if the foreigner really meant what he/she just said (these two groups often get into a fight and divert everything, when the unforgivers attack, and then the others attack the unforgivers for not being tolerant). Often the "foreigner" type will construct excessively proper but bizarre sentences, or will use vocabulary in unusual ways.
same guy as above - comment about Genius
Another thing, please don't go with the suggestion of a "genius", "hero" or whatever character who is smarter than everybody else and almost impossible to defeat. I think you know this already, but many people never seem to figure it out, that these types are an illusion, and they are really just one of the other types surrounded by weak warriors. I know of one message board where there is a poster who everybody on the board considers a genius type, but they don't understand that: two years ago on that same board, the "genius" got completely owned and flamed so bad by so many members of the board that he was flamed off the board, EVEN THOUGH HE WAS THE ADMIN! HAHAHAH, then he came back after about six months (again he became admin cause he was pals with the webmaster), and all the other powerful warriors were so disgusted that they moved on to other boards. What was left were syncophants, "me too"s, and assorted other weaklings who were complimented by newbies (he learned his lesson and began banning all other powerful warriors as soon as they appeared on the horizon), and was finally crowned "genius". The point i am trying to make: the people who want the "genius" type, are themselves either a) think they are the "genius" (i.e. delusions of grandeur), or b) are a very weak warrior (usually "syncophant" or "me too") who is awed by any interaction with one of the strong warrior types
How about the Masochist or the Martyr, someone who pruposely goes into a hostile forum and invites a beating. Sort of like the Target, except that he seems to enjoy getting the crap flamed out of him.
Another flamer I've observed would be the guy who is CONSPICUOUSLY ABSENT. Everybody's waiting, wondering where so and so stands on this one, but so and so, who posts on everything from astrophysics to pancake syrup chooses NOW to become curiously reticent. Flame by omission.
This one guy I knew, over the course of a month he united a dozen people over one guy in secret. To do this, he used a variety of techniques, like proving his worth over other Warriors so they would do things he told them, and at other times he created other identities that matched different Warrior types and he would use those identities to further his cause. Then one day, he made a post against his intended target (the target was a Netrat/Imposter), and the target replies, and suddenly a dozen Warriors joined in the fight against this target, and they nuked him. The Mastermind chased the target away from three message boards doing this. It was nice to watch.
A Pee-Wee is a minor irritation of no consequence, due to the fact that Pee-Wees admit that they are trying to be as annoying as possible. Pee-Wees are rarely more than silly and dumb, almost never being directly offensive. They are almost harmless, and are generally laughed at rather than fought. Pee-Wees, strangely, are often tolerated by other Warriors, simply due to the fact that everyone likes easy targets. However, when attempts are made to drive a Pee-Wee away, he will often turn into something more dangerous, such as a Palooka or Stone Deaf.
How on earth could the name Archie be left off the list? I am the head flame thrower at Losers, a community dedicated to flaming.
But disappointed to see no mention of "Sock Puppet". (Or is he there and I've just not spotted him?) Sock Puppet is someone who turns up when "Target" (or similar) is getting a mauling. Sock Puppet steams in agreeing with Target on everything. Unfortunately it is quickly spotted out that Sock Puppet bears a number of amazing similarities to Target (same spelling peculiarities, usenet server, timezone, posting times, etc) and is actually Target, in an attempt to give the idea that people agree with him, posting under another name using a disposable internet account. Sock Puppet is just Target throwing his voice. Also; nice cartoons, but do they have to be so big? They slow down access significantly.
Haven't read all the suggestions so this may be redundant, but where's the poet?
I am also dissapointed at the lack of 1337 I-I4x0r in the list...
Often posing as a Propeller Head, his attacks are far less devastating than most Warriors. The reason for this being that hardly anyone can even decipher the bizarre language he speaks.
Joined: 01 Jan 2005
He who has the ability to become whichever form best suits his situation.lol Anyway, just thought I would say great job. I just had to add this to my favorites list.lol
the Freelancer (doesn't really take part in discussions, but just finds a forum that seems appropriate and posts his essays, fiction and poetry), the Paperboy (kinda like the Freelancer, only he takes other people's work and posts it to the web)
the John Hancock
(huge .sig, often larger than the post),
the Amateur Professional
(who despite inexperience is a better authority because he's not biased) and its special cases the Quack, Street Lawyer, and Pseudoscientist (licenses and advanced degrees being tools of suppression).
The one I'd like to see added is the person who threatens to quit the group tearfully just to get people to beg them to stay. I know people who do that 3 or 4 times a year.
The wanderer is one of the most annoying warriors. Instead of actually settling down they wander from foorum to forum doing nothing but posting inanely boring or stupid messages then wandering off. Some wanderers may use the guise of the Test Monkey. Test Monkey Like Wanderer Test Monkey is not one for discussions but merely posts a test message with the rough wording "This is a test of my new newsserver. Don not reply." The most prolific of these will even get annoyed when someone responds. Penpal We all feel sorry for them. The Penpal species survive on posting weird resumes on forums in the hope of finding a like-minded partner. Sad, really. The Mike Artist, benevolent sage, creator? The Mike is now a dormant species but once he roamed from forum to forum seeking out personalities to draw and describe. He is a kind of Rolf Harris meets Indiana Jones. Poet Arty is the poet of the net. He replies in simple rhymes and yet He somehow still makes sense. They all j
Sniper, Prince, The Thing That wouldn't Leave and the Stalker
I've also run across other types that I've dubbed: the Sniper, Prince, the Boat Rocker, the Thing That Wouldn't Leave, and the Stalker. I have to admit that I am the Sniper. This type generally lurks on the forum and contributes now and then to a topic he finds interesting then retreats when the topic is copleted. He/she is different than the lurker in that he is not quite as mysterious and posts more frequently. Prince (also called Lazy) abbreviates everything (often in their own way) and uses 2 for "to, too, or two", 4 for "for", R for "are", and U for "you". This doesn't effect his argument strength, but it is annoying. The Boat Rocker is someone who descends upon the forum, and tells everyone what's wrong with the forum (and them). Boat Rockers always have a degree in Psychology, but it's never higher than a BA. The Thing That Wouldn't Leave is a version of the Crybaby, who after whining
This warrior's defensive tactic consists of demanding peer reviewed, industry-accepted, etc. references for each and every fact, no matter how well established, given in any argument directed against them. Any attacker is left paging through the library as the attack is ignored and the topic changes. though tenacious and a challenge, if their challenges for scientific-quality references is met in a timely fashion, they vanish without a trace.
suggest this sounds like a Proud Mommy suggestion.
I don't know what to call her (i'm sure you will think of something), but she is an older new mother who lets her new baby play with the computer, and thinks that it's just totally adorable when hundreds of people recieve dozens of empty, or nonsensical messages daily from her sprog pounding the keyboard with it's tiny little fists.
He has a mind-boggling amount of knowledge about a certain subject and uses it to daze and confuse his opponents. While this knowledge is often accurate, it is drowned in Profondus Maximus-like verbiage which make Little Plato both respected and disliked by his fellow forum denizens.
How about the l33t h4xor d00d (pardon any spelling errors, no hablo l33t)? Typically a 14-year-old posting from his parents' basement, his goal in life is to have a cellphone, pimp in da ghetto like real d00dz and eat pizza. Any worthwhile information he may possess is useless becaus of the way he presents it.
The Black Knight
The Black Knight (borrowed from Monty Python's Holy Grail): This warrior has a pet issue or argument over which they will never *under any circumstances* admit defeat. However logically undermined, factually corrected, or shown to be fundamentally flawed; the Black Knight merely shrugs it off as a 'flesh wound' and insists that the fight continue. The Black Knight may appear (at first) rather courtly and polite, but usually descends into insults as the battle continues. You can't even defeat the Black Knight by simply not arguing; as this only provides the warrior a chance to accuse you of cowadice. To succeed against the Black Knight warriors must entirely dismember his argument using every possible weapon at your disposal. Even then, the Black Knight will never admit defeat; but simply shuts up and disappears, usually emerging on a new forum to fight once again. Black Knights are incredibly frustrating for Philosophers, Issues and even Kung-Fu Masters may find themselves exhausted by this warriors dogmatic inability to admit the
This warrior has one thing in mind: promoting whatever strikes his fancy, especially his own home page. The Ho poses almost no threat in combat, as his singlemindedness prevents him from any other action, including self-defense.
Joined: 01 Jan 2005
The Sponge seems capable of absorbing any amount of venom. No matter how much invective or abuse is aimed at the Sponge, he will take it with gentle good humor. This is because the Sponge thinks that arguing looks foolish, and so yelling at a Sponge just makes the Sponge happier, which makes the yeller angrier, which makes the Sponge happier... The Sponge is often a secondary trait of the Jerk, Stone Deaf, Target or Troller.
Butthead [picture of a guy with ram's horns]: The Butthead will intrude on any topic that he finds at all interesting, no matter how clear it is that no one else wants him there. The Butthead is generally a fairly effective Warrior, due to the fact that he is genuinely interested in whatever is being said, and is hardheaded enough to continue expressing his opinion, no matter how much trouble it causes. The Butthead is rarely purposefully antagonistic, but any other Warriors with short tempers will almost always be set off by one.
I've come up with another set (Even though a whole bunch of mine litter the page.) There are 7 warriors I like to call Incredible Hulk, Glioth, Dirty Fighter, Flirt, Public Figure, Universal Soldier, and Model
The Incredible Hulk
The Incredible Hulk seems is a weak warrior, being eaten up by Me Too's without any help from the big dog, stung by the weak members of the swarm and picked apart by the other weak warriors until they touch a subject close to his/her heart and then suddenly, he turns into a powerful warrior destroying everything and everyone in his path, freind or foe, even going as far as picking up their personal information and meeting them with a gun at their house.
Golioth is the only powerful warrior in a faction of weaker warriors. When the weaker Philistines are in trouble, they call on their Golioth, which turns out to be a big dog, an admin or a philosopher. When he is defeated by a rebel leader, everybody scatters. warning to big dogs and rebel leaders: always choose your allies. It makes the difference between you bei
Flirts can be of either gender but they're usually males on a predominantly female board. Usually, every male on that type of board is a flirt. Deity is the warrior that is just good at everything and cannot be stopped except by another deity. You cannot hack a deity, due to deity knowing every hacking trick in the book. You can't outdebate a deity because he has an IQ higher than the cost of an average monitor. You can't even tap into his personal life, due to the fact that he could do it much better to yours. Deities are best left alone.
Public Figures broadcast everything and anything about their lives hoping that somebody cares about them. Public figures are easy prey for Dirty Fighters.
Dirty Fighter picks on the close family members of flame warriors, uncovering their private information and using it against them or using personal bad experiences shared from many warriors and uses those in any battles which he is clearly at a disadvantage. He has to be careful the person he's not hitting below the belt is an incredible hulk. Bones of many dirty fighters litter the battlefeild for a good reason too. Models like to show off their pictures on their profile thinking that they are so beautiful. That also makes them a good target for evil clowns and dirty fighters who will tell the model that they're ugly.
This warrior has extensive knowledge of a vast array of topics, and while rarely directly attacking another warrior, he will correct a forum participant with the information on a topic, oftentimes posting links and/or quotations to support his statements and theories. A true Encyclopedia is nigh impervious to harm due to his or her erudite knowledge of nearly all things. I myself am a combination of Encyclopedia & Kung Fu Master.
"The Unibomber" A 13 year old boy, who seems to be obsessed with bombs and explosive. A poor warrior, as his best response to most flames is limited to "I could blow up your house you know. I just need to buy a few things at the pharmacy."
Miss Popularity is the most liked warrior and has the support of everyone. She is a close ally of Kung Fu Master and doesn't fight much. Although she is rather powerful anyone who defies her will often end up being destroyed by the majority of the other warriors, making Miss Popularity a highly feared warrior.
The Copycat lurks around observing the other warriors and once he/she finds a suitable subject, he emulates that person and even makes himself/herself a similar name. The Copycat generally tends to annoy the other warriors and always comes back for round 2 after defeat. The Copycat usually copies Miss Popularity and then challenge her for an unknown reason. HINT: The Copycat will most likely retreat after a few defeats.
These warriors aren't always found in all forums. A primary enemy of the Deacon, the Respected Theist shares views and certain points about his Christianity, but never becomes overbearing. He often opposes the Deacon for 'Giving religion a bad name'. His points often make sense and is generally liked by the Bliss Ninny for his almost perpetual wanting for peace.
The Genius is one of the most feared, loved, and hated warrior. He intimidates his foes with his vast selection of attacks and almost endless knowledge. He is very slow to anger and his opponents tend to call him arrogant when his points are too good to argue with. Anyone who argues with him is silenced quickly because he is very difficult to argue with. He never boasts and most of his enemies usually flock to his side when they are defeated by him. HINT: He is unaffected by the Evil Clown as well as the Jerk. His favorite ally is the Android.
Gravedigger: This netwarrior refuses to let his pet topic die a natural death, no matter how thoroughly it has been hashed. If a Gravedigger finds his pet topic has been dead for a while, he will try to revive it, usually by repeating his same early points. Gravediggers share a lot in common with trollers, but can differ in that some actually try to seek support for their views.
Joined: 01 Jan 2005
Newscaster: One who posts informative articles, usually related to the forum's topics, and nothing else. Newscasters do not seek battles, nor do they tend to respond to attacks from other net warriors, as they find themselves with a host of allies quite willing to defend him.
. "Stupidity" keeps posting messages like "i can't believe you people like THAT! u r stupid! go 2 hell!" Note the grammer and lack of specific information. He obviously likes trying to insult people, and cannot understand why nobody agrees with his views. Not much of a threat at all; mostly ignored except by Tireless Rebuter. If, however, he does manage to provoke a fight, he will not be moved (see Ferrous Cranious). His tactics closely resemble those of Tiny Yapper. -Byrd (Fragile Femme, Coffee Klatch, and occasionally Lamer.)
I'm calling him Dark Knight. A nigh impervious warrior with little regard to what attacks you launch at him, or how much damage he does to you, Dark Knight simply thrives on fighting, and finds it entertaining. He can stir up a fight almost instantly. He may actually get into a fight with Duelests, and will even battle the Cyber Sisters for fun, because his heavy armor protects him from even their stongest attacks. He, on the other hand will often attack his opponents personally, and knows how to wager a successful war. Troller and Jerk may become his allies, and even Peacemaker may find quieting this menace difficult.
There's DiNier; no matter if someone proves that black is not white, they will take exception, it's like they have this automatic circuit and cannot agree with things, they MUST take exception.
I don't know if anyone's mentioned regular old Brainless. He could not post an accurate statement to save his life, deter him from trying, there's never been found a way. I would draw him with the top of his head sort of flopping to one side, like a beret - nothing inside to hold it aloft.
If you write and post a fairly deep essay on something covering many points, and work it over making it as good as you can make it, Mr. Slice will seize upon one facet of it, offer a short rebuttal, and ignore the entire rest of the thing. Others will key off of his little slice and the discussion will arrow off to somewhere else, it's like if you were hoping someone would respond to any of the rest of your points, or learn from them, or even acknowledge them, forget it, Mr. Slice has sliced a slice out of the cake and the group banquets on just that.
The legend would be one who was there in the forum's heyday, someone who challanged authority and was banned, or one who was just plain loved, but migrated on to greener pastures or a real life. Legends may be able to be found easily in a neighboring forum, or may really be gone for good. Legends are commonly referred to by Complaining Oldies, and may even stop by for a suprise visit, and possibly a battle or two with an Admin or newbie.
2. Complaining Oldie.
A harsh enemy of the newbie, a complaining oldie would be one of those few people who were around during the glory days of a forum, who sit around conversing with each other and complaining about how things "used to be back in the day". These are those who were around when a forum's first inside jokes came up, and these are those who stand in disgust when newbies and other ne'er-do-well's pathetically
L33T H4ck3r is missing, you can find him and his/her (her? - I don't think so..) mate Script Kiddie around the warez or 2600 groups. Darlings, one and all.
How about the 'Blatant Liar'? Example: We were discussing airline safety recently, and one fellow tried to make the point that airlines are unsafe by coming up with an obvious lie - that he had been on a near-miss flight once and on another occasion the cabin had filled with smoke. Just a thought. Keep up the good work!
One is Advice Columnist aka Ann Landers. She has a perfect solution to everything, whether you want it or not. Usually her help is appreciated, but sometimes it is resented, especially by Acne. The other warrior, who frequents my forum, is Monster (feel free to change the name). He is unforgivably mean. While sometimes insulting indeviduals, his favorite targets are minority groups, whom he will attack savagely just for fun. (Think "Jerk" meets "Troglodyte" meets "Evil Clown".) His uncanny ability to provoke almost anyone, along with his closed-mindedness, renders him an incredibly effective warrior. Troller may pretend to be Monster.
- Whether it's a get rich quick scheme, a detailed post about an "earth-shattering" philosophy, or simply a blatant "See my site" plug, the Spammer is easily recognizable because his posts always contain an offsite link. The Spammer doesn't actually battle, he merely posts to generate traffic to his own site or forum. In most cases, the Spammer merely drops a bomb and leaves, but in rare instances, he will reappear weeks later and demand to know why his posts were deleted or complain that no one talks to him. Usually not a threat unless the spam is of a particularly volatile nature.
- The Dragon is content to sleep most of the time, and is not concerned with petty squabbles, as long as they do not disturb his lair. When provoked, however, the Dragon will unleash a jet of flame so intense that it burns away many of the lesser warriors and frighten off any who are not truly dedicated to the battle. Often, Royals and Administrators will keep a pet Dragon or two and poke it awake when needed, to keep them from dirtying their hands.
Joined: 01 Jan 2005
You missed the "Jesus Freak" The Jesus Freak relates everything to the bible and heaven. They end every post with 'god bless' and will exasperate even the most sturdy warrior, telling them that they'll go to hell if they don't believe. Say in a discussion about a great rock band, they'll come on and say "you lot are all going to hell for listening to them and whatever you do, don't play it backwards". Probably one of the more persistent warriors, they are like mildew - easy to spot, but hard to get rid of. Caution: Troller has been known to imitate "Jesus Freak" Or How about "BORG" The borg assimilates everything in it's path. Even those who don't agree with it are still quoted in it's defense. Only Futitity is resistance where the BORG is concerned. The stronger you are, the more you will be assimilated and quoted in it's defense. The only defense is to strike first and assimilate it before any real damage can be done. Admin and
The pet theorist thinks that they have discovered something that the rest of the world has missed. hey have discovered conclusive 'evidence' that man never landed on the moon, modern physics is wrong, what happened to Hoffa, or that they have figured out how to build thier own perpetual motion machine. Anyone whoe attempts to point out erros in the pet theorist plan, no matter how knowledgable, logical or sound, will be instantly dismissed as being one of 'them'. Pet theorists typically construct large, elaborate websites about thier ideas.
The Next Bill Gates
They have discovered the next big thing, the next killer app, the thing that will some all of mankinds woes. A year from now they expect to be multi-billionaires, provided of course, they can find someone to front them the money. They sometimes develop incredibly detailed plans, designs and, economic projections, but they never seem to make any progress on actually developing thier product. When others point out what they see as potentially fatal flaws, rather than addressing these flaws, explaining how they will be solved or making use of constructive critisism, future Bill's tend to lash out against thier "close minded opponents that refuse to embrace the future" and refuse to give a single inch in thier defense of thier obviously superior idea.
...in the same form as Grenade not a Warrior as such but a tactic used by the more clever warriors. A mousetrap is a situation where your opponent makes a seemingly glaring error in his argument and has given you the opportunity for the death blow, but when you pounce on it you painfully discover you have been baited and your opponents unleashes a furious assult knocking you senseless. Particularly dangerous when used by Philosopher, Archivist, or my next offering....LOGIC
....Like Mr. Spock Logic is seemingly impervious to all emotionally based attacks and will respond to such with a detailed and clinical explanation of your errors in judgement. Usually lacking in wit, Logic makes up for it with pure...well...logical assaults and has the power to convince you that given the proper wind conditions, aerial galeforces, standars eath rotation, and correct alignment with the magnetic fields in the polar ice caps that a pig could leap from Lincoln, Nebraska to Pamplona, Spain.
...While usually an artful and skilled warrior, Kamikaze can keep pace one on one with Philosopher and even Kung Fu Master. Kamikaze's true nature is not known until he has been delivered the mortal wound at which time he will further discredit himself without hesitation if it means he can take you down with him.
...nothing in life has gone right for Woe. Usually female and habitating chat rooms, her husband has left her, she is unemployed with six months of back bills, she is about to get evicted, the dog bit her, she has a thin disc in her back which prevents her from any form of manual labor, and the government denied her welfare application. She only appears for brief times to see if anyone would care if she took a bath with her toaster. Nanny and Therapist flock to her without hesitation.
Hey I have to vote as well for a SHAPESHIFTER...someone who can switch from persona to persona at will. Not exactly a Jekyl and Hyde, he knows exactly what he is doing and does it constantly. Shapeshifter can be devestating when employing the Imposter persona and the Whisperer persona using secondary screennames to spread false information to destroy his enemy's alliances and create support for his cause. Maybe we should think up one for someone who posts six or seven times in a row and won't shut up. LOL
You forgot the Ogre. I am the Ogre. The Ogre lurks quietly behind a newsgroup until a smart aleck or a troglodyte goes off on a tangent, at which point the ogre pounces on a rich, golden opportunity to exploit their weaknesses for the sake of pure gutbusting entertainment. The ogre, familiar enough with psychology and the personal weaknesses of the other flamer/poster, proceeds to reduce both him/her and their argument into a steaming heap of hilarious rubble with a single pounding post. The ogre then sits smugly in his/her lair chortling and laughing at having prodded the other clueless poster to react and humiliate themselves, and laughing louder if the other poster behaves as expected, and heatedly, repeatedly jumps on the end of the ogre's argument string like a puppet, eventually being killfiled by everyone else who is sick of a flamer who has turned into a squealing broken record of monotonous protest. The ogre weighs a ton, is always six feet taller than all of the trolls and flamers, and can walk into a newsgroup, wr
Joined: 01 Jan 2005
Many forums these days (slashdot, everything, kuro5hin, etc) have instituted some kind of voting/reputation system. In these forums dwells the Karma Whore. This warrior produces content=free feel-good posts aimed soley at aquiring experience. These pose no threat but may draw fire from warriors as diverse as Eagle Scout, Target, and Troller. Karma Whores are often unsuccessfully imitated by Newbies, and tend to become Weenies, Sycophants, or join a Swarm.
While most people prefer the motions of a normal discussion Brief is the opposite. He/she refuses to post anything more than a few words. In artsy forums this may be such erronious comments as "nice" or "I don't like this", in other places you may even get the "YEs"/"no" variety. It is useless to challenge Brief as he/she will claim some sort of abuse and skulk away only to return when they learn to renod their head.
Where there is the net there is spam. Spambo is famous for holding the world-record for cross-posting. Even worse, Spambo usually posts advertisements for products such as Evidence Eliminator (browse porn sites and don't get caught) or the favourite "pass this on and win a million bucks in a day". While Spambo is mostly ignored, a Spambo who replies to any other messages can be a hardy warrior to shift.
PowerMonger usually starts off as Synchophant or MeToo...however, once Big Dog, a Royal, Nanny, or some similar personality makes the mistake of giving him any weight in the message board/forum/whatever, absolutely no disagreement or argument with him is allowed at pain of the worst punishment his jurisdiction will allow (especially dangerous if also a PropellerHead)
Most people, even when using bad grammar, are understandable (at least in a lexical sense). Garble is the truest exception. Blatant misspellings and typos, along with a sheer lack of captialization (unless they accidentally hit "CAPS LOCK" and never turn it off) and punctuation are the trademark of Garble. Garble will also occasionally quote someone else without saying so, adding to the pandemonium he causes. The best cure for Garble is to let Grammarian and Nitpick run their courses; either he will start speaking like a human being, or his respect will dwindle until he says something like "yuor forum si stupef" and leaves. The "oPS i HITTED THE CAPDLOCK" variety can be driven away by the Netiquitte Nazi for excessive shouting.
Lonely Guy has nothing better to do than post to forums. Berzerker has many better things to do than post to forums, but he neglects all of them. Berzerker's sheer bloodlust keeps him in whatever forum he haunts, and his thirst for battle drives him to be one of the most powerful warriors. Even he knows that his indiscriminate attacking could bring down a forum, so he stays out of most politics of the forum, and is always engaged in multiple battles at once, every ongoing battle he so much as knows about, so that he doesn't concentrate all his energy on one hapless soul. Berzerker may also assume the roles of Nanny, Sentinel (coming next), Netiquitte Nazi, Swarm, Howler, and if female, roughly half of a group of Cyber Sisters just to channel his thirst for battle. A Berzerker must be shaken from his loyalty to the Royals if a Rebel Leader is ever to succeed. If Berzerker becomes a Jekyll and Hyde, he could end up worse than a Godzilla attack.
Fruitcake belongs to some philosophy almost nobody (or at least nobody in said forum) agrees with but is generally harmless. Given about as much credibility as Bong, Fruitcake is kept around solely for amusement purposes, especially if a veteran such as Philosopher wants some...unusual practice. Generally, only a select few members such as Evil Clown will actually attack Fruitcake.
This fellow(?) is completely unreadable. He pops up every now and then with a post that completely indecipherable, often in the middle of a completely different conversation. Any attempt to respond to or provoke him results in silence, or even worse, a series of equally mysterious answers; maybe with links to unrelated sites and quotes that have no bearing on anything. Unlike Loopy, he doesn't seem to be actually aware of the MB or the other warriors at all. He's
This is a warrior who, when confronted with a proposition, immediately and tirelessly searches for and comes back with a ream of quotes, facts, links, books, and a hoarde of other data in favor of his position. He literally overwhelms his opponents with information. He's a little like the Archivist, but he isn't interested in past discussions or other warriors per se. He just wants to prove his knowledge. He can be fearsome on an intellectual level, but he doesn't do very well against emotional warriors like the Troglodyte, who won't look at his facts anyway. Can become unglued when his research isn't acknowledged.
An unpredictable master of deception, Coyote Trickster will in normal discourse disguise themselves as a more benign type, such as the Philosopher or the Coffee Klatch. However, when presented with what they perceive as an outrageous idiocy perpetrated by some other Warrior, they will proceed to show the offender the error of his ways. Coyote Trickster rarely engages directly; a favored tactic is to pretend to agree with their target, and then push the offending concept ad absurdum on the pretext of supporting it.
Joined: 01 Jan 2005
suggest Tactic Their Fault
Another tactic, rarely used because of it's potential to backfire but potentially of devastating impact, is to force the issue into each and every thread of any fora the offender is on, in a way that sets the target up to take the blame. Their goal is to chide the opponent humorously rather than to win the overall flame war, which they usually
The Devil's Advocate, someone who takes a very clear, very serious stand on an issue just for the fun of seeing what people say. He's a bit like Palooka in that he doesn't care how many times he goes down, but for him it's never about winning the fight, only about fighting. A frustrating opponent for Issues, Rebel Leader, or anyone with a point to pound home, because they suspect he is not taking them seriously.
the tester: that anonymous poster that takes on many aliases. Never contributing anything to the forum, his/her posts consist only of an empty message with only the subject "Test" or sometimes with the word "test" in the body of the message. An altered version of the tester is the doppleganger, whose posts include nothing but the contents of the post that he/she replied to. No one seems to know why these people do this, only that the message seems to come out of nowhere, for no discernable reason, and the person seems to be in every forum. If this gets included, someone email me in case I don't check back.
Spook. Often confused with Stealth or Grunter. A warrior who refuses to go into battle without finding out everything possible about the people involved. An expert on intelligence techniques, often having some kind of access to government records. Often uses events in warrior's histories that they would rather not have mentioned in public as part of the discussion ("That sounds good coming from someone who spent 6 months in jail in 1970 for ...." or "This is from someone who has been fiddling his tax figures for the past three years" for example.) A significant foe for even the best warrior as it is hard to know just how much he knows about you. A Spook who is also a Propeller Head is especially dangerous.
Patriot! You know the drill. The guy in forum who practically wraps himself to American (always American) flag. His posts mostly contain of "USA! USA! USA!" and he loudly supports any American military action against other nations. When Europeans and other civilized folks inevitably reply, he decries them as "America-haters" and responds by telling how we'd all speak German or Russian without Americans. Usually very hardheaded, especially taken all the other Americans who readily defend his POV. Mostly conservatives, but in some cases liberals too.
And a new idea. On our forum we have some fellow that reacts by making a thread whenever someone 'harrasses' him. That includes disagreeing too much with him. So he spams the whole 1st page actually.
suggest Parrot Quoter
What about the person who rebuts by copying and pasting a particular paragraph or sentence you’ve just written in order to make his or her argument. I mean we all know what was just said, sheesh! I can just imagine receiving a business letter stating: You said: “insert text here”, then replying as though I were a complete idiot and needed reminding.
Heres one you forgot :) [insert a picture of a mirror of eyes and arms+hands+legs+feet] Mirror: Mirror is a very dangerous opponment and one you should not annoy, as he flaming technique is very dangerous, and there is no known counter, all he does is copy + paste the post of anyone who tries to attack him and switches the name around, he doesnt ever stop doing this, he will never stop deflecting all attacks, adn the only known way to defeat him is to confuse him by either over-attacking him or simply ignore him, because of his nature he never starts a war of his own.
suggest Has Somthing
I'd like to see a net warrior representing that guy on the list who has something that everyone else wants and can throw his weight around because of it. Someone who runs a server, or has useful information...seems to me these people are especially powerful on music/band related sites...come to think of it...I am that guy...anyway...
You cannot post new topics in this forum You cannot reply to topics in this forum You cannot edit your posts in this forum You cannot delete your posts in this forum You cannot vote in polls in this forum