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The Voice of Reason Joined: 31 Jan 2005 Posts: 1368

Deciding to kill 2 birds with 1 stone here, first the which drink are you test:

http://www.liquidgeneration.com/quiz/drink_quiz.asp

I got cosmopolitan

http://www.liquidgeneration.com/quiz/images/cosmo.jpg

I am somewhat(but not totally) metrosexual yes.

Then the which circle of hell are you going to test(don't worry, you may get purgatory):

http://www.4degreez.com/misc/dante-inferno-test.mv

my results:

I am half-temped, actually more than half, to post a slew of sites with tests on them. Your minds would probably fry after just a few. Twisted Evil

[url=http://www.liquidgeneration.com]

[/url]

I can't believe the results of Dante's Inferno Test
The wretched King Minos has decided your fate. His tale wraps around his body 7 times.
The sweet light no longer strikes against your eyes. Your shade has been banished to... the Seventh Level of Hell!
Seventh Level of Hell

Guarded by the Minotaur, who snarls in fury, and encircled within the river Phlegethon, filled with boiling blood, is the Seventh Level of Hell. The violent, the assasins, the tyrants, and the war-mongers lament their pitiless mischiefs in the river, while centaurs armed with bows and arrows shoot those who try to escape their punishment. The stench here is overpowering. This level is also home to the wood of the suicides- stunted and gnarled trees with twisting branches and poisoned fruit. At the time of final judgement, their bodies will hang from their branches. In those branches the Harpies, foul birdlike creatures with human faces, make their nests. Beyond the wood is scorching sand where those who committed violence against God and nature are showered with flakes of fire that rain down against their naked bodies. Blasphemers and sodomites writhe in pain, their tongues more loosed to lamentation, and out of their eyes gushes forth their woe. Usurers, who followed neither nature nor art, also share company in the Seventh Level.
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Lady_Aleena
"An it harm none; do as ye will"
Sticks and stone may break my bones, but whips and chains excite me.

Moonshine is me.

Your shade has been banished to... the Eigth Level of Hell - the Malebolge!

Purgatory Repenting Believers Very Low
Level 1 - Limbo Virtuous Non-Believers Very Low
Level 2 Lustful Very High
Level 3 Gluttonous Low
Level 4 Prodigal and Avaricious Very High
Level 5 Wrathful and Gloomy Very High
Level 6 - The City of Dis Heretics Moderate
Level 7 Violent Very High
Level 8- the Malebolge Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers Very High
Level 9 - Cocytus Treacherous High

I got close to Limbo, but ended up going to Dis!

Yay! I'm a heretic!
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I'm lustful and Boone's Farm? Who makes up these things?
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The Average Woman Would Rather Have Beauty Than Brains Because The Average Man Can See Better Than He Can Think

The Voice of Reason Joined: 31 Jan 2005 Posts: 1368

I'm a bottle of Jack Daniels, going to the third level of hell. I do like to eat Sad

I disagree with the inferno test, because it assumes that Christianity is the only true religion and if you believe anything else, you're doomed. Besides, I happen to think that any god who would sentence his followers to an eternity of suffering because of the minor sins of one lifetime is a demented psychopath that I wouldn't want anything to do with anyway.

Yeah, but since the test is based on Catholicism the results kind of have to assume it's Christianity or bust. Personally, I'd like to see a reincarnation test based on Hinduism.

Edit: Oops, forgot my results!

[url=http://www.liquidgeneration.com]

[/url]
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Tireless Rebutter / Archivist
The Grand Suggestion List

It's based on a very specific form of Catholicism, too, one that isn't as widespread anymore, where gluttony was right up there with unmarried sex and murder.
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The Average Woman Would Rather Have Beauty Than Brains Because The Average Man Can See Better Than He Can Think

The Voice of Reason Joined: 31 Jan 2005 Posts: 1368

Actually if it were based on that I would assume the circles for violence, lust, and gluttonny would all be together. Instead lust is circle 2, gluttonny is circle 3, and violence is circle 7.

Also the lustful suffer a lame, boring punishment where they are blown around in the dark. The gluttons are forced to lie in unpleasant terrain and be rained upon lest cerberus tear into them. The murderers however suffer a much more horriffying punishment where they are boiled in blood. So if it is based on that then it is extremely flawed.
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I've got good news:

I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance by NOT BUYING ANY.

I really think that Dante should be considered a science fiction author - after all, what sf authors do is describe places others have never been, usually based on mentions in books most of his audience have read. And that's pretty much Dante. He had a lot of interesting and vivid imagry, and showed a lot of imagination.
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The Average Woman Would Rather Have Beauty Than Brains Because The Average Man Can See Better Than He Can Think

The Voice of Reason Joined: 31 Jan 2005 Posts: 1368

Many people do consider him a science fiction writer. Though he clearly had his head up his ass when he wrote paradise(the saint's are confined to a fucking seat for eternity, oh yeah, that so makes me want to be a saint), of course he didn't get it all right on inferno either(having your head facing 180 degrees backwards is no where near sadistic enough a punishment to belong in circle 8, even the lustful in circle 2 have it worse[the rest of circle 8 is pretty scary though])

edit color=red
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I've got good news:

I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance by NOT BUYING ANY.

I never could understand why anyone would want to spend an eternity singing praises to God with the holy host. Sounds dead boring, IMHO.
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The Average Woman Would Rather Have Beauty Than Brains Because The Average Man Can See Better Than He Can Think

I guess the kind of person who actually manages to get into heaven would probably enjoy it.

The Voice of Reason Joined: 31 Jan 2005 Posts: 1368

And what exactly would you do there? Twisted Evil

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The Average Woman Would Rather Have Beauty Than Brains Because The Average Man Can See Better Than He Can Think

The Voice of Reason Joined: 31 Jan 2005 Posts: 1368

Exactly what you're not going to be doing in circle 7 ring 3 for that remark, partying with jesus.
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I've got good news:

I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance by NOT BUYING ANY.

Sorry kiddo, I'm not a Christian so I don't worry about that. I'm just concerned for what I'll be next life.
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The Average Woman Would Rather Have Beauty Than Brains Because The Average Man Can See Better Than He Can Think

The Voice of Reason Joined: 31 Jan 2005 Posts: 1368

You're hindu then?
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I've got good news:

I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance by NOT BUYING ANY.

I no longer try to lable my religion - my parents went through every known Christian sect in my childhood, and I wound up differing with every single one of them including Unitarianism - and trust me, that one takes work. (No it doesn't really, you just have to get tired of being made to feel guilty). It is my proud boast to have been excommunicated from both the Roman Catholic and Mormon churchs for the same heresy - hey, at least I'm consistant.

I believe in a life force, in reincarnation, and karma. If you do mean things deliberately, it will eventually catch up to you. There is a way to grace, and a way that will make your life harder. I try to stay on the righteous path that all religions follow - and you will notice that all religions have a number of shared beliefs - not killing, helping others, a long list. The closest I can come to orgainized religion is bahai.
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The Average Woman Would Rather Have Beauty Than Brains Because The Average Man Can See Better Than He Can Think

The Voice of Reason Joined: 31 Jan 2005 Posts: 1368

Given that they're saints I think it kind of does in that sense. The problem I have is just why is it that dante failed to make the heavens seem progressively better? He did a good job(for the most part) of making hell seem worse as you go deeper(though there are exceptions[I'd rather be a suicide tree than in a burning tomb{I'd rather also have my head facing backwards and have to fuck miss cleo than be anywhere else, unless it's limbo}]), and purgatory was okay except for the lustful terrace which cleary featured the worst punishment for the lesser of the 7 sins, but paradise he just plain fucked up on it.
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I've got good news:

I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance by NOT BUYING ANY.

He may have been concerned with coming off as a blasphemer. Let's keep in mind that the time he wrote it in wasn't the most tolerant period of history.
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Tireless Rebutter / Archivist
The Grand Suggestion List

The Voice of Reason Joined: 31 Jan 2005 Posts: 1368

Good point, I would have to wonder why he wasn't so cautious about hell though.
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I've got good news:

I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance by NOT BUYING ANY.

Furious Typer Joined: 14 Feb 2005 Posts: 81

The wretched King Minos has decided your fate. His tale wraps around his body 8 times.
The sweet light no longer strikes against your eyes. Your shade has been banished to.... the Eigth Level of Hell - the Malebolge!

The Voice of Reason Joined: 31 Jan 2005 Posts: 1368

If you worship satan, you should have gotten cocytus.
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I've got good news:

I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance by NOT BUYING ANY.